Yami Malik buys a refridgerator
by never to return
Summary: Yami Malik is up to his old tricks! Huh? No thats not supposed to mean anything. If you want to be entertained and don't mind losing brain cells, read this!


This is Yami Malik buys a refrigerator, the sequel to Otogi buys a washing machine. If you have not already read that story I suggest that you do so before reading this one. Its not integral to the plot, I just want more reviews for that one. And so onto the stupidity.  
  
(Aboard the Kaiba blimp)  
  
Bandit Keith: Where am I? And what on earth am I wearing?  
  
Malik: Shut up you buffoon! And go capture Yugi's sennen puzzle for me!  
  
Bandit Keith: Capture his puzzle? Wasn't that last year?  
  
Malik: What do you mean?  
  
Bandit Keith: Well we already did this at the very beginning of the Battle city story arc, and now we're all the way to the part where everyone is on the Kaiba blimp.  
  
Malik: Now why in Ra's name would anyone name their blimp "Horse"?  
  
Bandit Keith: I have no idea.  
  
Malik: Well if what you say is true, then shouldn't you be dead?  
  
Bandit Keith: Gasp! It's true!  
  
Bandit Keith then fell off the blimp and into a strategically placed ocean.  
  
Bandit Keith: Ouch. *dies  
  
Malik: Well I guess that it really is season three, that does explain why I'm on this blimp, but where's Rishid?  
  
Rishid then swung by on a vine  
  
Rishid: I'm right here master Malik.  
  
Malik: Rishid watch out for that tree!  
  
Rishid crashed right into a tree that had somehow found its way onto the blimp and was knocked out. Stupid George of the jungle!  
  
Malik: No Rishid! Ow the pain, I'm not going to make it. *falls down  
  
Yami Malik: Yes now I am finally free! And it only took an entire page for it to happen, now I shall kill the pharaoh and take his power for my own!  
  
...  
  
So Yami Malik calmly walked through the blimp in search of Yugi, but then all of these annoying people kept getting in his way.  
  
Ghost: I am Ghost Kotsuka and I am very scary, I hang out with a British guy!  
  
Yami Malik: How did you make it out of the shadow realm?  
  
Yami Malik then went ahead and killed Ghost.  
  
Haga: I am Insector Haga and you are going to become a snack for my insect pets!  
  
So Yami Malik killed Haga.  
  
Ryuota: I am that one annoying ocean bastard. No one likes me because I never stop whining about how I lost my father at sea and because my long lost brother is in love with Honda!  
  
So of course Yami Malik killed Ryuota, it was practically a mercy killing.  
  
Jonouchi: I am Batman! *flaps arms. This is Pac Man, Akira Toriyama, and Wonder Woman.  
  
Yugi: How come I have to be Wonder Woman?  
  
Yami Malik: At last we meet Pharaoh! Now I shall kill you, take your power, and wear your head for a hat.  
  
Anzu: Hey why did you have to make such a mess? I'll bet that these peoples FRIENDS wont appreciate this!  
  
Yami Malik: You imbecile! You're acting as if these people actually had any friends. Now go do my bidding or some crap like that!  
  
Possessed Anzu: Yes master.  
  
Yami Malik: Now that all of this is done I can get back to what's really important, killing you Yugi!  
  
Yugi: But I'm not Yugi.  
  
Yami Malik: Your not?  
  
Yugi: No I'm really Otogi, it's Halloween right now here in Japan.  
  
Yami Malik: Oh, all right. Could you tell me where the real Yugi happens to be then?  
  
Yugi: He just went through that door right next to you.  
  
Yami Malik: Do you mean the one that says "CAUTION AIRLOCK" on it?  
  
Yugi: Yep, that's the one!  
  
Yami Malik: Well then I'll just go in there and kill him now, wish me luck!  
  
With that Yami Malik stepped through the airlock and fell right off of the blimp! Oh come on, you didn't see that coming?  
  
Yugi: I can't believe that he actually fell for that.  
  
Honda: Well now that he's gone lets go have a party on the deck of the ship!  
  
Jonouchi: There gonna be lots of food!  
  
Anzu: Did you know that potato chips are the international food of friendship?  
  
Yugi: I'm tired of talking so much, I'm going to go sit in silence with Ryou.  
  
And so they all made their way to the main deck to set up the party.  
  
`  
  
(Meanwhile about ten thousand feet up in the sky)  
  
Yami Malik: Hey what's going on here? Yugi wasn't behind that door, and why is the ground getting so close?! Oh damn.  
  
SPLAT!  
  
And so Yami Malik had a very nice meeting with the ground and therefore will not be appearing in this story any further. Boy I probablly made a lot of Yami Malik fans mad just now, if only there were some way to put him back in the story. Hey wait I have an idea!  
  
`  
  
(Down in Hell)  
  
Ghost Kotsuka: Now I really am a zombie, give me all of your locator cards!  
  
Haga: Well at least this isn't as bad as that other fic the author put me in.  
  
Ryouta: Hey look over there, I think I can see my dad!  
  
Yami Malik: This is horrible, I don't know how it could get any worse.  
  
Esper Roba: Alright now who wants their palm read?  
  
Yami Malik: ... grrrrr.  
  
`  
  
(Back on the blimp)  
  
Everyone was up on the outer deck starting the party, well everyone except Kaiba, he was just standing in the corner and scoffing at everyone. But that's okay because that is just something that Kaiba does, it's a wonder that Mokuba doesn't act like that too.  
  
Anyways our heroes were standing around talking with one another while they waited for the other people to arrive.  
  
Jonouchi: ...but I just think that tomato is a better soup flavor than chicken noodle.  
  
Honda: Well you're going to have some real trouble convincing the rest of us of that.  
  
Yuugi: Well at least this party is more fun than having Yami Malik chasing you around.  
  
Just then Mai made it to the party, and for no reason other than that my favorite character must be in all my fics.  
  
Mai: I have no time for parties, I am a duelist!  
  
With that Mai passed out and went back into her coma.  
  
Anzu: That wasn't a very friendly thing to do.  
  
Ryou: sigh.  
  
Jonouchi: What's the matter Ryou?  
  
Honda: Yeah, you're usually not "this" quiet.  
  
Yuugi: Ryou is sad, we must cheer him up! Anzu, go do something funny.  
  
Anzu: My underwear has Barbie on it!  
  
Ryou: sigh  
  
Honda: I can't believe that didn't work!  
  
Yuugi: What do you mean "didn't work"? I wanna see em now!  
  
Jonouchi: Why?  
  
Yuugi: Because I'm really a pervert like in the manga.  
  
Ryou: I'm sorry guys, I just haven't been feeling like myself lately.  
  
Yuugi: Why not?  
  
Anzu: Maybe its because you're really not yourself.  
  
Ryou: What do you mean by that?  
  
Anzu: I mean that maybe you aren't Ryou Bakura.  
  
Honda: I knew it, he's really Yami Bakura! Lets all use physical violence!  
  
Jonouchi: No if he were Yami Bakura he would be licking blood off of a bunch of random objects.  
  
Yuugi: Then he must be someone else! Who do you think he is Anzu?  
  
Anzu: Lets ask Mai.  
  
Kaiba: How you buffoons? She's in a coma. Scoff scoff scoff.  
  
Mokuba: Can't we just let them try big brother?  
  
Kaiba: They can go jump off the freaking blimp for all I care.  
  
Mokuba: Yay! Now ask her!  
  
Jonouchi: Alright, you heard the creepy, escaped zoo animal.  
  
Anzu: So best buddy Mai, what is wrong with Ryou, what is his secret?  
  
Mai: ..........snore..............  
  
Anzu: GASP! Ryou's secret is that he's really [Dramatic pause] SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!  
  
Yuugi: GASP!  
  
Honda: GASP!  
  
Kaiba: feh.  
  
Jonouchi: GASP!  
  
Mokuba: Is all of this true Ryou?  
  
Ryou: Well I guess if comatose Mai says so, then it must be true.  
  
Yuugi: GASP!  
  
Honda: GASP!  
  
Kaiba: feh.  
  
Mai: snore.  
  
Jonouchi: GASP!  
  
Crusty old sea captain: GASP! Arrrrg!  
  
Honda: What are you doing here crusty old sea captain?  
  
Crusty old sea captain: My job is to follow Spongebob Squarepants around and sing his theme song.  
  
Anzu: Why?  
  
Crust old sea captain: Because I'm a senile old fool who sniffs glue.  
  
Yuugi: This is getting way too strange, can we end the story yet?  
  
Jonouchi: That's a good idea, but how will we end it?  
  
Kaiba: Why don't you idiots go sing a song with the stupid old man!  
  
Anzu: Okay!  
  
Ryou: Oh I wish that I weren't here.  
  
`  
  
(Tha Spongebob song)  
  
Captian: Are you ready kids?  
  
All: Aye aye captain!  
  
Captian: I can't hear you!  
  
All: Aye aye captain!  
  
Oh, who lives in the Sennen ring under the sea?  
  
Ryou Bakura!  
  
Quiet, depressive, and adorable is he!  
  
Ryou Bakura!  
  
If his Yami is someone you need...  
  
Ryou Bakura!  
  
Then pull out a knife and make someone bleed!  
  
Ready?  
  
Ryou Bakura, Ryou Bakura, Ryou Bakura, RYOU BAKURA!  
  
Ha ha ha ha ha burp.  
  
The End.  
  
?????Wasn't Yami Malik supposed to buy something????? 


End file.
